This is what I've had today:
An apple
A carrot
Some weird potato thingy
A candy skull
2 pieces of mint mentos
LOADS of Chicken and rice
6(!!!!!) scoops of ice cream
[PURGED in the bathroom at the cinemas]
A handful of crackers
7 pieces of chocolate
Wine gums
A bowl of yoghurt and cereal
3 toast with butter
The worst part is that I'm still craving more!! I feel HUGE! I need to go out for a run tomorrow (I don't care that it's gonna rain), and do a couple of hours on the cross trainer and double my situps tonight. This is not acceptable. I'm just so scared my ED's gonna change direction and turn into a binging disorder instead of ana/ednos. This. Is. Crap. I wish my head wasn't so fucked up. I wish I didn't spend all my time counting calories in my head. I wish I didn't have those binges. I wish I could be thinner. I wish I could be better. I wish I could be normal. I wish I wasn't afraid of being normal.
xoxo
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