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I suck. I'm hopeless. I can't even keep a blog updated regularly. I was gonna apologize. Then I realised there's nobody to apologize to as nobody really reads this shit anyway.

So all I'm gonna do today is post a picture that shows the difference between me today and me in early February.

100818

Oh fuck the reasons. There are too many to catch up with now. I suck, I know.

So I got back from Malta 6 days ago. I miss that place like hell. Well I miss the people even more. Especially the one person. Fuck. Why do I always have to do this? Falling for guys who live too far away and are "too old for me". I'm hopeless. And he's amazing. Fuckfuckfuck. Don't know if I'll ever see him again. But we did make a deal last night that no matter what, we will see each other again. Some time.

I'm addicted to Owl City - Vanilla Twilight because it describes exactly how I feel right now.

When I came home from Malta I was on my period so I was heavier than I should've been, so I could see how much weight I'd really lost. It only showed 2 lbs now. I hate periods. That's one of the very few good things about mia, when I'm in that shit I hardly ever get my period.

I haven't b/p in ages, don't know when the last time I did that was. Sure I've purged, but not binged. I'm proud. I'm still too fat though. 110 lbs. I need to go lower. Now.

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Dont have time for reasons now, I'm in malta and I'll catch up on them when I get home.
Anywho, I'm deff thinner now than I was when I left sweden, so thats all good. There/s a lot of party and little food. Im happy. Cant write much more now. Sorry.
xoxo

100801

13. Because fat people are disgusting

It's 4:23 AM and I can't sleep. I'm too excited about going to Malta today, plane lifts in 10½ hours, omgomgomfg. I'm so stoked! And I'm hungry. Haven't eaten properly since Thursday, today it's Sunday. So all I've eaten since then is two small sandwiches yesterday. I feel awesome though. I need to be skinny when I'm gonna spend 11 days on the beach and in the clubs.

I am now 113 pounds, so I am losing, and I want to lose 9 more pounds before school starts on August 20. probably not gonna happen, but you can always hope eh?